June 27, 2011 § Leave a comment
Beyoncé’s latest album 4 is released TODAY (June 27th), and to celebrate its releases she’s performing a surprise (and not really so secret) show at Shepherd’s Bush Empire this evening. I failed to win tickets so may instead spend the evening crying as I recreate the ‘Girls’ dance and pretend I’m there. I don’t think it’ll be very convincing.
The show is in conjunction with Belvedere vodka, who are streaming the show live onto the side of Battersea Power Station. The validity of this claim somewhat evades me, are they really going to do it? Perhaps I’ll take my dancing down there and be with all the other B-lovers who failed to gain entry. Battersea here I come *fist pumps and steals a police mans badge*
[EDIT – I GOT IN! Review to follow (although it can be summed up with one word – unbelievable.]
May 23, 2011 § Leave a comment
Some popstars get by on their name alone. They build up a fanbase who, as the years progress, support them no matter what they do. They sell out arenas, millions of albums fly off shelves, and the money continues to roll in regardless of whether or not their talent warrants such success. No names being mentioned but I’m sure a few ‘artists’ spring to mind….
And then there are the rare stars. The ones who are truly talented, and show passion and skill that only grows stronger and deeper over time. Enter Beyoncé Knowles.
Even though everyone was aware of the fact that Beyoncé was set to receive Billboard’s Millennium Award last night, most of the excitement still surrounded other performers. Nicki Minaj, Rihanna, Britney Spears set to duet with them both. And yet when it came down to the actual performances, Beyoncé blew them out of the water. This is honestly one of the best performances I’ve ever seen.
There’s so much less fanfare and pretentiousness when it comes to Beyoncé. Everyone was counting down the days, minutes, seconds until Lady Gaga’s video for ‘Judas’ dropped. When the video for ‘Run The World (Girls)’ made it’s way onto the web very shortly after, did it come with such an intense and highly publicised build-up? No. Was it a hundred times better? Yes.
Beyoncé simply does what she does, and holy shit does she do it fantastically.
May 19, 2011 § Leave a comment
Anyone uttering criticisms of this video clearly has neither eyes in their head nor blood in their veins.
(P.S. Criticisms of use of animals could possibly be allowed, although I’m sure B-town treated them lovingly)
May 6, 2010 § Leave a comment
Beyoncé is STILL releasing songs from I Am…Sasha Fierce. No seriously, have I counted wrong or is this the NINTH single to be taken from it?! Surely that has to be some kind of record?
Anyway, numbers aside, Beyoncé has just released the video for this single, which is set to be released May 17th (although it has already reached the #1 spot on the Billboard Hot Dance Club Play chart).
The video features Ms. Knowles as ‘B.B.Homemaker’, a stylish woman who likes to drink, do housework, and dust off her, oh I don’t know, SIXTEEN GRAMMYS..as you do. There’s crying on the phone, there’s car fixing, there’s a bubble bath…and I like it. It’s shot differently to most videos at the moment, the fact that it doesn’t have a glossy sheen to it it rather nice. It’s a kickback to the olden days, and somehow manages to portray Beyoncé classily even when she’s lying on the floor trying to sip the last dregs of her martini.
The fact that this song is taken from an album released 18 months ago is also pretty impressive. It’s not her best song but it still manages to sound fresh, and full of the attitude we’ve come to expect from Beyoncé.
March 12, 2010 § Leave a comment
The build up to this video has been intense. Does it live up to all the hype? Hell yes. GaGa delivers an epic 9 minutes and 32 seconds of craziness involving fights in a women’s prison, the poisoning of a restaurant full of people, the infamous ‘Pussy Wagon’ from Kill Bill, and some epic dancing-whilst-dressed-as-the-American-flag. The product placement involved is insane and annoying but these days it should be expected.
I honestly admire GaGa’s willingness to stand up to her critics and face the accusations thrown at her. “I told you she didn’t have a dick”.
February 3, 2010 § Leave a comment
The Grammys are seeming more and more like Santa each year. Weird comparison? I say that not because the ceremony is full of people dressed in red velvet with giant bushy beards (in fact compared to Lady Gaga that would be quite demure), but because they are becoming less and less magical with each passing year. As children we are filled with joy at the thought of a magical man who travels around the world in one night, delivering gifts and spreading joy. But then we grow up and our illusions are shattered as we realise none of this is possible, that Santa is nothing more than an excuse for our parents to eat mince pies and drink sherry in the middle of the night. In this way, the Grammys and Santa are the same to me. As soon as I knew of the existence of the Grammys, they held a special magical quality for me. Grammy winners were true stars, idols. The ceremony was a magical evening filled with incredible performances, and everything and everyone sparkled from the fairy dust that encloaked them (at least through my little eyes). Now I’m all grown up, and all of this has fallen apart.
Still, each year I find myself eagerly anticipating the awards. And each year I am left with a bitter taste in my mouth as the realization sets in that the music industry is run by powerful people who have no interest in music itself but are instead entirely concerned with their bank balances. Not that this is some big secret, I mean I’m not inventing the wheel here. I just find it fascinating, and terrifying, that the influence of these people is so far reaching. They rule the charts, as well as the minds of consumers who buy, listen to, and support the music that they are told is ‘popular’ (thereby creating a self-fulfilling prophecy and actually making it popular).
I’m not saying that all of the artists that the National Academy of Recording Arts choose to honour are undeserving. Take for example this year’s biggest winners, Beyoncé Knowles and Taylor Swift. Both are talented and hard-working women who I really do have a lot of respect, and even admiration, for. Are there other artists who are just as equally talented artists out there who go without any recognition? Definitely. But I have no qualms with Knowles and Swift winning. They have real talent. Which brings me to the Black Eyed Peas…
I can only compare the first time I heard ‘I Gotta Feeling’ to the first time I heard N-Dubz. I laughed. I cringed. I said “This will never be liked/get any airtime/be in any way successful”. Then I watched as all of those statements were categorically disproved. Even to this day, I do not understand why the song has been so successful. It has a relatively decent beat, but the lyrics? Practically non-existent. It’s just Will.i.am yelling out random sentences. “I got my money…let’s spend it up…go out and smash it…more random syllables that fit…” For this song to be hailed as the best group pop performance of the WHOLE year is shocking. Although I suppose it’s only fitting when you consider just how successful the song was. It’s just a shame that popularity, and labels like ‘best’, have nothing to do with quality anymore. Or perhaps never did.
It’s interesting how the group have managed to completely switch categories without anyone noticing. Their first two Grammys (yes, they have racked up several wins), for ‘Let’s Get It Started’ and ‘Don’t Phunk With My Heart’, were for Best Rap Performance by a Duo or Group. Then in 2007 they won Best Pop performance by a Duo or Group for ‘My Humps’. Because obviously the sound of that song is genres apart from the previous two. Obviously. No? (Don’t even get me started on those wins, ‘Let’s Get It Started’ was originally ‘Let’s Get Retarded’ and ‘My Humps’ was nothing more than Fergie fondling herself for the world to see. Whilst Wikipedia claims the song was ‘the subject of severe criticism by the music press’, the Grammys chose to hold it up and honour it as having excelled all other group pop performances of that whole year). The award for Best Pop Vocal Album also went to the Black Eyed Peas, ahead of nominees Colbie Caillat, The Fray, Kelly Clarkson and P!nk. Being a huge P!nk fan there are major issues of bias here so it’s probably best I keep opinions regarding this category to myself (let’s just say if Funhouse and The E.N.D. were to get in a fight, I know who’d I put my money on).
After having attacked almost everything about the Black Eyed Peas, it seems a little contradictory to say that I actually don’t dislike them that much. They just happen to be a very fitting example of what popular music has become. It seems that if you take a semi-decent beat, a selection of rhyming syllables, and a whole load of neon paint…you get Grammys. Trent Reznor of Nine Inch Nails fame made a brief appearance on Twitter (@trent_reznor) to post this ‘The Grammys = the old guard / old media propping up their puppets trying to convince the outside world (and each other) they’re relevant.’ Whilst I agree with the sentiment behind his comment, I believe the people he references are in fact very relevant, and if not relevant at least very powerful. And in the business world, power seems to equal success.
Perhaps you disagree with everything I’ve said, and think that the winners were all very deserving of their honours. Kings of Leon for example. They’re a good band, they make good music, ‘Use Somebody’ actually beat out Beyoncé to win Record of the Year. Which is fantastic. If it wasn’t for the fact that Kings of Leon are probably now destined to make Only By the Night over and over again, or forever be shunned by the industry. Just look at Kelly Clarkson. Don’t dare try and change your formula once you’ve become a Grammy sweetheart!! (Sarcasm doesn’t come across so well in type). But what do I know? Certainly nothing of any importance. Perhaps all of the points I’ve made have been invalid. It’s hard to explain coherently what you think when all you really want to do is find an object large and weighty enough to knock some humanity back into every single money-grabbing, soulless person in the music industry. Boy that’d have to be a big object.
My final point is somewhat more hopeful than the pessimistic rant I have engaged in for the past however-long-it-took-you-to-trawl-through-my-narcissism. Whilst many things about this year’s Grammys left me feeling perplexed and irritated, there were moments of brilliance. Namely P!nk. Lady Gaga opened the show by bringing Elton John out for a theatrical, ash-smeared rendition of Speechless/Your Song. People cheered. Beyoncé then charged her way through her If I Were A Boy/You Oughta Know mash-up (crotch grab included). People cheered. Some stood and cheered. And then came P!nk. And she blew them away. Just in case you think my aforementioned bias is coming into play here, I’ll refer you to the words of Bill Werde (@bwerde), editor for Billboard.com. During his running commentary of the night, he tweeted this “Some asking if I missed Beyoncé’s standing o. But she didn’t get a full house by a longshot. Pink brought the whole place up.” Performers like P!nk give me hope that maybe the music business isn’t dead after all. She sang live whilst performing acrobatics in a silk suspended from the roof of the Staples Center. If talent like her exists, why are we rewarding the people who lip-sync, the people who make the same song over and over again, the people who seem to have no passion for the industry that is making them so rich. I’d like to say that with talented performers being given a stage (for the record I include Beyoncé and Lady Gaga in that statement), perhaps other artists will step up, and consumers will stop being drawn into the web of commercialism that is spun so enticingly around them. Sadly, the vast majority of people are so conditioned to expect imitations that they cannot tell fake from real. This is typified in the fact that a large number of people questioned whether or not P!nk did sing live during her performance. She did of course. People are simply so used to this lip-sync, auto-tune nightmare of an age that we live in that they cannot believe a performance of that class could be real. Well kids, it was. Now get back to watching those robot dancers the Black Eyed Peas brought with them. If you stare hard enough, you might not notice that Fergie can’t actually sing.